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With stunning suddenness and almost no
opportunity to prepare ourselves for the blow, B'nai Jacob Synagogue, this community, and
the Kanner family have been orphaned by the untimely passing of our beloved Harry Kanner.
He served B'nai Jacob with distinction as its dedicated financial secretary, executive
director, administrator, gabbi, shammas, and loving and most devoted son for almost 40
years, one of the most cherished and loyal members of our synagogue.
Since this is one of the intermediate days
of Succot, the feast of Tabernacles, Jewish tradition dictates that there be no elaborate
eulogy today, no sadness, no overt grief. Even the official period of mourning for the
family must be postponed until after the holiday concludes next Sunday.
That seems impossible. How can we not be sad?
How can we not cry?
We have lost too much.
But if I can, permit me to be faithful to our
tradition. I will not voice words of sadness or grief today. In the very sanctuary that
Harry Kanner called home, I will rejoice this afternoon in the memory of a great man, a
noble man who is still with us and who will always be with his family and this synagogue.
The Baal Shem Tov, the founder of the Chassidic
movement of Judaism also died on one of our major biblical holidays about 250 years ago.
As his strength ebbed and the end seemed to be quite close, he said to his anxious and
saddened disciples, "Do not cry for me. When the clock in my home and the clock in my
synagogue stop, only then will you cry, for when that happens you will know that I am no
longer among the living".
The Baal Shem Tov's message to his loved ones
was beautiful. He was telling them that as long as the two places he held most dear, as
long as two places he loved continued to go on, as long as the clock of his family chimed
and as long as his place of spiritual strength, (his shul) grew not still, his personal
clock would always march forward. As long as his family and his followers remained
faithful to his teachings, he would live on forever.
I find comfort in that, because I think in many
ways Harry Kanner was guided by two clocks that measured his life and recorded his labors
and his incredible achievements.
Harry's two clocks were in the home where he raised his
extraordinary family and in B'nai Jacob Synagogue, the shul...His Shul...that he cared for,
and that he loved. They set the pace of his life, and in their rhythm, he walked through life. And
they are still going strong.
Harry Kanner was born in Charleston, he grew up
on the East End and in the Jewish community. In fact, he lived his entire life on the East
End, always near the synagogue. Everyone remembers "little Harry" delivering
bagels for his mother Lattie. He was a good son and grew up to be a good man. Before he
became the active and passionate individual he was for the synagogue, he worked for the
Internal Revenue Service, not the most popular job to have. And yet, talking to others,
what was remarkable about Harry was despite the type of responsibilities he had, he never
had enemies because of what he did.
Later on in the synagogue, he would do many
things and because of his important position he was involved in many areas at the
synagouge that could cause some animosity. But you know, Harry always had a large circles
of friends and admirers. He was a very popular man and loved even by people who vehemently
disagreed with him.
How?
People would disagree with Harry but they loved him, they
respected him. If Harry said something at a board meeting, he may have been the only one
man with that view but his opinion usually swayed the outcome and was often the direction
the synagogue turned.
Why?
I think I know.
I think it was because of something told to
me the other day. As you may know. Harry served in World War II and during the war his
ship was attacked. Luckily, he was on the other side of the ship during the attack so he
made it into the water safely. But the aftershocks of an attack usually killed many of the
survivors in the water. They perished because they were floating on their stomachs.
Harry survived because in training he was taught to lie on his back. He was told that that
position would allow him to protect his vital organs. He did as he was told because as he
later proudly recounted for his family: "I always followed the rules."
"I always
followed the rules". That was Harry.
Harry Kanner was loved and respected even by those who
disagreed with him because Harry was a straight shooter. He did everything by the book, he
always followed the rules. He said what he believed and acted on it. And even when you
disagreed with him, you respected him for that.
For Harry there was never any gray areas.
He did what he thought was right and he had a strong moral sense of right and wrong that
you felt.
And let me tell you he was one of the fairest men I have ever known. He
stood by his principles.
Throughout his life, he did that.
And I think that earned him
the respect of so many.
In 1958, Harry Kanner came onto the synagogue
board. With each passing year his duties and responsibilities continued to multiply. He
was Men Club's president, he took charge of issuing dues statements, then came Chevra
Kaddisha overseeing the two cemeteries, maintaining the general welfare of the synagogue,
maintaining the parish home, supervising the daily services, coordinating the High Holiday
services, the Passover food orders. And for all of this he was paid a pittance and put up
with a lot of grief.
With each year his list of responsibilities grew longer and longer a
list that never ended.
Why did Harrry do all this?
I think it was another reason why Harry Kanner
was so loved.
Harry was a man who gave his heart and his very being to making B'nai Jacob
the House where G-d may dwell beautiful attractive and meaningful.In an article in the
Charleston Daily Mail Harry said
"I'm a strong believer in G-d.
B'nai Jacob is where
G-d lives in Charleston, the G-d that watches
over the Jewish people."
This
institution was his passion.
This utter love of B'nai Jacob made Harry B'nai Jacob's
devoted son, it was why with each year he did more and more, and it is only right that we
are here today to hold this service in this building to which he was so deeply and fully
dedicated. And, his clock is still ticking because this
building, this institution still stands strong and sturdy. This community is still proud,
active and dedicated. Harry Kanner saw to that every day of his life and therefore, Harry
Kanner is very much a live today.
Harry was a good son, son-in-law, brother and a good
husband. The father of five children and grandfather of 14, and he is dearly beloved by his
family who adored him, respected him, and loved him beyond description.
You know what else
everyone admired about Harry? It was the type of family life he had. The children told me
Harry's only regret was he didn't have more children. I know why. You would too if you
were so darn good at it like Harry!
How many of us looked out this Rosh Hashono at the
section where Harry traditionally sits and could not help but admire, perhaps even be a bit
envious, at a man married to a most wonderful wife of 49 years surrounded by his entire
family. All faithful to Judaism, all keeping kosher as he was so proud to note,all active in
this synagogue and their own respective synagogues. All loyal, all good, all cherished.
How many of us have enjoyed a meal at the Kanners and admired their ever explanding
portraits, a growing glorious Jewish family. Oh how he loved his grandkids and they loved
their zeydie. If a person achieves this kind of family life, you know that his life was a
blessing.
His wife Jeannette always joked that Harry loved his family and loved his synagogue but
not necessarily in that order. Jeannette also said, "I can compete with the
blond, I can compete with the brunette, but I can't compete with the shul".
He and I talked
twenty times a day at least. When I called his home and Jeannette picked up I would say
"Hi Jeannette", and she would say, "Hi rabbi, you want Harry". We
talked a lot. And I, like everyone here, knew his kind of tough exterior. He had a tough
exterior. Don't ever get Harry mad. Few times did you ever see him cry. Few times would he
ever show emotion.
That was Harry.
Harry was all business. He was tough! Yet, in my
presence, his eyes always teared up when we talked about his family. He was so proud of
them, so happy with his wife, his children, their spouses, his grandchildren.
His clock is
still ticking because his family still stands for what he believed in, what he cared about
and what he practiced. He knew that and thus Harry Kanner is very much alive today. He
felt so blessed and he was. His clock is still ticking today.
I knew Harry Kanner the legend before I knew
Harry Kanner the man.
Let me explain.
Before I came to Charleston for my interview in
1986, I talked to Rabbi Cooper and after telling me about the synagogue, the community,
and knowing I was nervous about my interview, he proceeded to tell me that I should not
worry that I'm inexperienced and new to the rabbinate. He told me I picked the best place
to start my career because Harry Kanner will help me out.
I asked, "Who is Harry
Kanter?"
Rabbi Cooper said "Harry Kanner", and then he said, "You'll see".
Before my interview, I had
the pleasure to have dinner with my predecessor Rabbi Landau who also told me about the
community and the synagogue and then said, "...If you have any problems or you need advice,
just go to Harry. You can trust him and you will learn to value his judgments. And he'll
always be there and stand by you". I said to myself... "Who was this Harry Kanner?"
And then I met him...and then I worked with him.
And I began to understand.
Harry Kanner was
the greatest gift I ever received when I came to Charleston.
Twice my age, Harry was like a father to me,
praising me when I did well, criticizing me with love when he felt I was wrong. He would
tell me to slow down my speeches. He would tell me who I should probably go see since that
person has been ill. He would even tell me when I needed a haircut or that he didn't like what
I was wearing! He would help me when my car wasn't working. He put in my phone line for the
internet connection at my home. He even showed me how to start my pilot for my water heater.
Harry
was also my confidante. He was someone I could go to and ask for advice, someone I could go to get feedback
when I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do, and I knew I would get a straight and honest
answer. I also knew that what I shared with him would never be disclosed.
Harry was also
in many ways my best friend. When I was sad, when I was discouraged he would pick me up.
When I was happy...when I was joyous, Harry would share in my happiness. But most of all he
helped and guided this inexperience, unprepared rabbi grow and learn to be what I am today.
Because of his constant support, love and friendship and I will never forget that.
He was
there for every rabbi and for every President of this synagogue, but I think I was the
luckiest because I had a special relationship with him. He was always there for me and I
will never forget that.
You know Harry and I were talking just this
week. It was right after Yom Kippur services. I was exhausted but there was Harry in the
library just like he always was; doing the synagogue books - a phone in one ear on hold
with a person about a fence for the playground, explaining to Terry about
the set up and procedure for the holiday of Sukkot, all at the same time.
When things settled down, I said to
him, "Harry, I can't imagine what I'd do without you. There is so much that goes on in
this synagogue that happens only because of you".
I thought of the recent
acquisitions of the new golden books and pedestals.
Who arranged that?
Harry.
I thought of
the incredible number of projects that Harry had overseen in just the last two years.
I
thought of the Torah and Ark covers that we change for the holidays, the Sukkah that has
to be built every year, the lulav and esrogs that have to be ordered, and the constant set up
of the synagogue.
Who remembered to do that?
Harry.
The funerals... Who told the gravediggers
where to dig, who checked the cemetery?
Harry.
The various memorial tablets, the plaques
that need to be ordered, who sees that they're done?
Harry.
That the prayer books and
prayershawls are in order, that the board meetings run smoothly, that the finances are in
order, that appropriate newsletters and flyers are proofread and sent out, that the
individuals whose names are supposed to be memorialized at services are read, that the air
conditioning and heating units are in working order, that the services run smoothly, that
schedules don't conflict, that the pastries are ordered for events, that the gym is ready
for church league.
All this and so much more was done by Harry.
It all past before me, and
there he sat eating some peanuts ( which were not good for him). So I said to Harry, "Harry, you get sick on me and I'll never speak to you"..."I can't do this without you"...The shul will shut down without you. You are irreplaceable!"
And Harry looked at me and
said "Rabbi, no one is irreplaceable".
He proceeded to tell me how optimistic he
was about the synagogue. How he was seeing so many young people more active in this shul
than at any other time. And he told me, " Don't worry. The synagogue is in good hands.
No one is irreplaceable". And then he was no longer on hold and he was back on the
line trying to get the fence up.
That was Monday morning and Wednesday he was gone...
Harry, you always told me you are never wrong.
You even said you once thought you were wrong, but even then you were right.
Well, I hope
you are right Harry, because though many will try to fill the void, you are irreplaceable.
There are NO individuals that can ever fill your shoes.
But I promise you, Harry Kanner
that we will keep this shul going and we're going to make you proud. You always said
"I don't like things to slip up. Anything that goes on at B'nai Jacob is 1st
class".
Like the patriarch of old, you molded this institution and made it the proud
and glorious synagogue that it is today. And I promise, we are not going to let you down.
Your clock will keep on going because this synagogue, your synagogue will keep on going.
That is a promise, my friend!
I conclude by saying I will never be sad, I will
never cry when I think of Harry because of seven words..."He was on his way to shul"
"He was on his way to shul"
On Wednesday evening, Harry's physical heart, not his
spiritual heart gave out on him as he was walking to B'nai Jacob.
How fitting. Harry left
his earthly raiments on his way to synagogue.
I can't help but smile. Here was a man who
was very ill. He had so many medical disabilities, yet despite the fact that his heart was
only functioning at 20% capacity, he lived his final years with the same passion for his
family and his shul as ever.
In his final weeks, he was with his entire family at
Synagogue and spent the most important Jewish holidays with them at home and coordinating
and orchestrating the religious services at the shul he so loved.
And on his final day, he
was at his synagogue that morning in prayer...he was at his home with his wife in the
afternoon...and he was on his way to shul when his years came to an end at sunset.
His
final summons occurred when he was exactly halfway from his house and his synagogue on
Elizabeth Street. He was on his way to shul.
Even Harry couldn't have planned it better.
A
beautiful ending for a complete and full life.
What a beautiful life! And it has only begun.
The clock in his home where he was king, continues to function. His home, his family
continues to be dedicated to his Jewish faith.
The clock in his synagogue where he was her
loyal son continues to set the pace. His synagogue, the place he offered his time and
devotion is still standing....And he was on his way to Shul.
Harry, dear sweet Harry.
You
are still here at shul.
You will always be at B'nai Jacob, just as you will always remain
in the hearts and souls of your family and friends forever.
AMEN
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